A Memorial Celebration for David Clapper

Journal / Updates to be posted here occasionally.

For pictures and information on the memorial service held at White Oak Church of The Brethren… click here

January 1, 2009

Happy New Year’s Greetings from Wamena!

How are all our Dear Ones on this brand new day in a brand new year?  It’s amazing, looking back over our year, how far the Lord has brought our family in the last months.  We trust you can see God at work in the ups and downs of your life, too.  We have so much hope in knowing the Lord! It’s become increasingly urgent and beautiful to experience His presence in deeper ways than ever before.   Sitting by the fire and reflecting in the wee hours of the mornings, there’s not a thing that I can think of that that God has not provided for us, even though this is Dav’s first Christmas in heaven and we miss him keenly.  Sometimes I almost have to pinch myself to see if I’m dreaming that we’re back in Papua and pressing on step by step!

Backing up to the months August 9 through September… We were plunged over a huge waterfall in the shock of hearing Dav was missing and then that he’d really gone to be with the Lord when his airplane crashed on a ridge near Ndunu. Then came the weeks of mourning with the local people,  all our friends & coworkers, and the people in the villages that Dav had served.  Picking up the pieces of our lives and the loose ends of Dav’s ministry to the people of Papua, drove me many times to my face in desperation for wisdom and strength. Those were challenging days when I felt like my faith was stretched to the breaking point.  Looking back, I know we only survived those days because you and so many around the world were praying constantly for us.

The month of October rushed by in a whirl of 5 memorial services for Dav back in the States.  In the midst of all that, Judah and Tirzah were able to attend two youth retreats, which blessed them so much. We’re sometimes asked whether those services were draining or overwhelming.  As a family, we all feel like we received FAR MORE than we ever put out  in effort!  Looking back, I’m thankful that God impressed us to do 5 memorials. It seemed like the extended time of grieving and processing was truly  what we needed.  I’m often amazed at how well the children have handled the homegoing of their dad. They have accepted God’s sovereignty and perfect timing.  I’m certain it’s because you’re praying fervently for us! Can I pause and thank all of you for the emails, scriptures, cards, prayers, meals, help with travel, organization of each service, the birthday cakes for Tirzah and Victoria, gifts of money, gifts to spoil us – (like frappucinos, butter socks, foot massages, perfume, books, prisms for making rainbows, music, etc!!!), help with the memorial day food, brown bag lunches, snacks, coffee, cookies, enough food so that Mom and Dad just finished the last of it the other day!! Thanks for the phone calls, the love, the concern, and for not being upset with me for not answering many of our 2,000 (+) emails!  I’ve read them all and love them… just keep writing even when we don’t answer!!! Pleasssse?! You’ve been amazing.  It’s opened my eyes in a brand new way to  what a GIFT the Lord has given us in being part of His Family!  Your loveand support has been phenomenal!

The end of October found all the girls and me headed back toward Indonesia through Singapore so I could have some follow-up on a previous mammogram with some concerns.  We were really learning new things there in that CLEAN city of Singapore, how to exchange money, navigate our way around a strange city, and survive our first trip without Dav.  We didn’t do too bad… I discovered that Dav’s children  definitely inherited his keen sense of navigation and direction!  I’m hopeless with navigation.  I have to cover my mistakes by walking twice as fast to make up for lost time in all my wrong turns! I teased them that they were better with navigation, but I was faster!  At the end of a long day of waiting results of my new mammogram and trying not to fret that the children were going to also lose their mom to cancer, I was finally called in and told that everything was CLEAR!  I am so grateful that God is giving me more time.  So GRATEFUL.

A good part of  November, I spent time reading through books on grief and books of others’ experiences. (“From My Grieving Heart to Yours”, “Singled out for God’s Assignment”, “To Live Again”, “Understanding Your Grief”…) I learned to slow down,  the power in being “still”, appreciate even more the “grief companions” God had already set up for me, reconciled myself  more to my loss, & found out that many had survived worse and that I would survive too. Katherine Marshall’s book, “To Live Again”, said things like,“…there’s a therapy in having to carry on…  that God hadn’t forsaken (Dav) in his death or me in my life”.  She spoke of “ seeing the other side of God’s comfort… God’s comfort doesn’t walk on tiptoe as in  a sickroom;   it marches.  There is steel at its backbone.  It is a bugle call for reinforcements.  It makes us remember that the word “comfort” is derived from the word ‘fortis’—which means strong.  God comforts us with strength by adding resources.  His way is not to whittle down the problem but to build up the resources.”  She also said,  “I have no idea now what the future holds or what it is that God wants me to do.  I just hope that I can take this great crisis in my life in the spirit of an adventure.”  (I wished I’d gotten a chance to know this lady!) Like her, I felt a “kind of peace that comes not from the absence of any pain or difficulty, but rather from knowing that I had gone through the flames and had survived the ordeal.  From that travail I had been left with a crucible of conviction that, since Christ is beside us, the worst that can happen to any one of us in this life need not overwhelm us.  I realized that out in my future somewhere there might be other sorrows, other crises.  But there was also the sure knowledge that I need never meet any future difficulty alone, that help from a loving God would ever be available for the asking, that resources beyond imagining are always at our disposal—provided only that we are willing to put ourselves in the stream of God’s purposes.”  I also read scriptures like, Fear not… thou shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more for the Lord hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in spirit… with great mercies will I gather thee.. And all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children…  Isa. 54: 4,6,7, 13  “Discipline always seems for the time to be a thing of pain, not of joy; but those who are trained by it reap the fruit of it afterwards…. So up with your listless hands!  Strengthen your weak knees:  And make straight paths for your feet to walk in.” Heb. 12:11-12  “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and  come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.  You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” Jer. 29:11-13.  These things I learned and too much to write of!

The end of November, the girls and I made a Thanksgiving meal with a (REAL) turkey and all the trimmings and hosted our first large meal with friends.  I saw one of the AMA planes Dav used to fly coming and going in Wamena that day and  had to deal with the sudden, strange feeling that he was coming back home for Thanksgiving.  It was melancholy,  nostalgic,  and so SAD to keep reminding myself that he wasn’t coming home. Ever.  I remember that afternoon of  coming into my bedroom and lying on my face on the bed and desperately waiting, again, on the Lord to renew my strength. ( He really met me there and did renew my strength that day! How can you help but love a God like that?!) The best part of the day was after pumpkin pie, sitting by the fireplace, to recall all the blessings the Lord had showered on us throughout the year.  I totally agree with Katherine Marshall that “Gratitude is a sure cure for self pity”!   And  I’ve discovered that when we lift up praises in our sorrow, there is a real POWER in that.

In the beginning of December, we went all out decorating the house, baking cookies, listening to Christmas music, and preparing for Judah to come home for Christmas!  Somewhere in there, I also continued work on my internet studies for a teacher’s certificate in teaching English as a foreign language.  I am finding it fun and that I actually seem to have some hidden ability with English… imagine that, me who can hardly open her mouth and speak! ^_^ I also submitted all my certificates (the ones I’d “collected” with Kris and Christy Minnich’s help…  for various life experiences) and my “resume” (this should be good! ) so they could begin applying for my  more permanent visa. We’re praying over those certificates, asking the Lord to bless them and grant me a visa through them.  The man who is working on my paperwork said he felt very positive about me getting a visa, so that was exciting news!  My temporary visa can be renewed again at the end of January.

On December 18, Judah arrived home to Wamena! He was tired but happy to be back and has basked in the peace of life at a slower pace.  It must be one of the greatest feelings in life for a mom to have all her children under one roof for the holidays!  (And speaking of a roof, I really pity anyone who has never known the joy of falling asleep to the sound of rain pattering on the tin roof!) I’m seeing some maturity on the part of all the children as they have gotten rearranged in their birth order, again.  I realize constantly how much they’ve grown.  These past months they’ve become a more precious gift to me than ever!  It’s neat to hear less sibling conflict and to see that their loss has brought them into a deeper relationship with the Lord.  It’s one of those things I cherish most about  God’s timing.  I really believe He’ll use our trials at this particular time in our lives in a surprising way.  I trust Him for  spiritual growth as a family. He’s amazing.

Christmas Day was a good day.  We truly had a special day! Again, we really felt your prayers! It was as though a real spirit of joy and peace settled among us as we had our traditional Christmas Brunch, shared gifts, spent time together,  and celebrated the coming of the Lord Jesus who gives us so much hope when we’re helpless in and of ourselves.  In the evening, we really enjoyed being invited over to Todd and Debbie Adam’s  lovely, old, wooden house (built by some of the veteran missionaries) for Christmas pie and coffee.  We sat around the fireplace and listened to Grandpa Virgil’s stories, laughed lots, ate cookies, and enjoyed Grandma Bonnie’s hugs.  We were a part of their family that night and were warmed by their love and hospitality.

Today is New Year’s Day and last night we didn’t fare as well.  We’d planned a fun evening of games, finger snacks… crackers with a cream cheese ball… all kinds of good food, praying and praising the New Year in…  but, just before our evening meal, Jasmine and I started to come down with a stomach bug that’s been passing around.  So we had to cancel our plans.  And the two of us were sentenced to bed at a terribly early hour! Somewhere in the night, I was aware of BLARING music from across the street.  There was a Firecracker WAR breaking out, and the windows were being lit up with the blazes from fireworks that seemed to be coming from our entire yard!  I could hear them streaking over the roof and going off on every side.  I groaned inwardly and prayed that our house wouldn’t burn down.  I felt helpless to do more than pull the covers over my head and drift back into a fitful sleep.  Thankfully this morning, when I woke up, the house and shed were still standing and both  Jasmine and I are feeling so much better!

I really hope you all know how much we love you and cherish your friendship!  God bless and keep you one and all.  May this New Year truly be one in which we live each moment as though we stood on the edge of eternity… live with deeper faith… passion for sharing the joy we’ve found in Jesus.  May the Lord help us to live with no regrets, keep short accounts, cherish our loved ones while we have them, forgive each other of faults, become more teachable… learn to wait more on the Lord.

With bear hugs  and love from all us Clappers,

Beth

Oct. 7, 2008 (Tuesday) excerpt from email

Hello, dear friends and family!

I miss Dav and wish he was here with me (and all of us!) in the invigorating breath of Autumn.  I just spent some time alone outside in the stillness.  The crickets were chirping away, leaves beginning to flutter down.  A wave of melancholy drifts over my heart… I feel the empty place beside me… the sun is warm, but not hot like it is in Wamena.  I wander in and out of a prayer.  –… Dav is safe forever and ever… the promise of heaven…  the gentle & ever present awareness of my sweet Jesus.  I find  a deep peace still fills my soul like it has from the start of my journey. I am so blessed!! How would I be feeling to be a Papuan widow?  I feel like I barely qualify for the “Fellowship of Suffering”.  I think of people who have no closure… who have it worse… who live with a bigger burden every day.  I find myself filled with compassion for them. Oh Lord, be their God… lift them up… ease their pain…  these are the ponderings of my heart……..The first two memorial services have gone by and now like I mentioned, the third one is being held tonight.  We’ve actually felt ministered to as we’ve gone through  each one… instead of it draining us, it seems to be FILLING us. (See, look at the power of your prayers!)  The first was held by Dav’s family and had more of a slant toward Dav’s younger years and school days. The children really enjoyed Dav’s brothers (their BIOLOGICAL uncles ^_^)  who each resemble him so much!  I feel that the children are generally doing well…  We have our moments!!  Don’t get me wrong!  ….Now and again, we all have our little “meltdowns”.  But we’re learning to deal with these times and how to more quickly forgive and forget. Just keep praying for them!

Beth and the Bunch

I  opened my daily reading in Streams in the Desert and read things like—  “When from my life the old-time joys have vanished,  Treasures once mine, I many no longer claim, This truth may feed my hungry heart, and famished:  Lord, You remain here!  You are still the same!  And on and on.  I suddenly realized in a fresher, deeper way – that the Lord is my pillar, Dav is no longer here, but God is.  That’s why I can still have a deep joy and hope… because “Lord, you REMAIN here! Still my heart has THEE.”  It drives me on to see His presence more and more.  To know Him more fully!  I already see that with the Papuans & Indonesians, I have begun a new relationship with them because we are now “comrades in suffering”.   “ Lord, give me the grace to EMBRACE the fellowship of Your sufferings”! I want to accept the suffering God entrusts to me, seeing it as an opportunity to receive a greater measure of knowing Him more intimately.  May God enable me to live like this.”

“9-9-08  Judah is gone for several days right now into the accident site.  He hiked in there with 6 men on Monday.  We still haven’t heard word from any of them… trusting all is going well with their trek!” Beth 9-11-08 We were successfully able to reach the crash site Tuesday morning. We spent about one and a half hours up there before starting back down. It was an incredible hike, and we are most grateful to God that nobody in the group sustained any real injuries. It took about 9 hours hiking in and about 7.5 hours back down. Judah was able to recover several pieces of the wreckage.      Eric: Head pilot from AMA

In a recent email, Beth writes about her (overwhelming “to do” list)…
“ I would love to answer everyone myself but right now I’m running with all my might for that airplane that’s leaving in a week back to the States. Sometimes my cell phone, international phone and home phone are all nearly ringing or being used at once! I am trying to finalize itinerary dates, appointments, transportation, visa issues, finances, emails, etc, etc! I need to get the house ready for us to leave for 6 weeks and finish up with the local needs ( like what to do with the last of our remote village quests, Yusup, Sarwina, and baby,  who are still staying in the back.)” Note: they travelled to Wamena 3 weeks ago to sympathize with the Clappers and have not been able to finalize their transportation back to their village until now. “Immediately after pouring my heart out to God about what to do with Yusup and Sarwina, the phone rang and it was  actually the very answer to my prayer.  Tomorrow these guests are being given a special chance to charter an entire flight by MAF. ( What an awesome God!  Now they can not only go themselves, but also take the items they bought for their little store.  This will fulfill the flight Dav promised them before he went to be the Lord.) Thank You, Lord, and brothers in Christ, one and all!”
(Message from Beth) I sit here today in Wamena, Papua with the heavy burden of having to tell you that Dav is with the Lord. read more

(message from Beth) I’m writing this down so you and our Family of God can help me remember this and can pray specifically in this area!! —Yesterday I was impressed to just go up on Tirzah’s bed several times and lay there waiting on the Lord.  I didn’t even have the words to pray.  I let Him pray for me.  I meditated on Isaiah 40: 31, “They that WAIT upon the Lord….” And so I waited, and waited.  read more

My name is Isaac Rogers and we live in Papua and are friends with the Clappers.
On Saturday the 9th we flew out over the area where we thought Dav might have crashed into the mountain. The problem was that there was solid cloud cover over the entire ridge as we despertly searched for Dav. As the sun went down we had to head back to Wamena. This was very hard for all of us as we didn’t know how Dav was doing! (read more)

Beth and the five Clapper children ( Judah, Tirzah, Natalie, Victoria, and Jazmine)  will be in Papua  (Indonesia) until the end of September.  Judah and Tirzah had been in the States for 2 months before their father went to be with the Lord. They arrived in Paupa in time for the funeral service.  Dave’s parents (Donald & Carol Clapper) and sister (Charlene) traveled with Judah & Tirzah as well as my son David and I.
In the midst of the intense trial for the Clappers we saw Gods tender compassion and faithfulness that He manifested towards Beth and her children. The prayers of Gods people were surely being heard by our faithful Father in heaven. At times it was quite intense, at other times it was quite peaceful.  Most important it seemed as if God prevailed in bringing each heart towards the cross and surrender at the feet of His Son, our Christ; the only place where sorrow and joy can walk together. It was beautiful to see how God comforts His children that yield to Him during their darkest hour.
Each of the children seemed to keep a strong faith in the Lord and are resting in God in the midst of their sorrow.  As a young man Judah brings a sense of security to the family along side of his mother Beth. I was encouraged to observe the maturity, wisdom and strenght that God has blessed Judah with. Beth and the children truly are blessed with the grace of God.

Your prayers for the Clappers are important.  (Keep praying)
Aaron Beiler

Elisa is one of the smelliest, dirtiest and snottiest humans on the planet and he has never met anyone who treated him with such love and dignity. Dave treated him like Jesus would. This is my tribute to Dave Clapper, a true man of God. read more
It would have been safer; financially more profitable, and an easier life if Dave and his family would have stayed in America……….The will of the Lord be done….. click here
Tis So Sweet To Trust In Jesus, is a song that has been special to the Clappers since Dave’s passing:
Chorus:
Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him. How I’ve proved Him o’er and o’er. Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus! O for grace to trust him more.
Verse:
I’m so glad I learned to trust Thee, precious Jesus, Saviour, Friend; and I know that Thou art with me, wilt be with me to the end.

The following is a meaningful devotional reading that Beth read one morning during family devotions: Sorrowful, yet always rejoicing. 2 Corinthians 6:10

Sorrow was beautiful, but his beauty was the beauty of the moonlight shining through the leafy branches of the trees in the woods. His gentle light made little pools of silver here and there on the soft green moss of the forest floor. And when he sang, his song was like the low, sweet calls of the nightingale, and in his eyes was the unexpectant gaze of someone who has ceased to look for coming gladness. He could weep in tender sympathy with those who weep, but to rejoice with those who rejoice was unknown to him.

Joy was beautiful, too, but hers was the radiant beauty of a summer morning. Her eyes still held the happy laughter of childhood, and her hair glistened with the sunshine’s kiss. When she sang, her voice soared upward like a skylark’s, and her steps were the march of a conqueror who has never known defeat. She would rejoice with anyone who rejoices, but to weep with those who weep was unknown to her.

Sorrow longingly said, “We can never be united as one”. “No, never,” responded Joy, with eyes misting as she spoke, “for my path lies through the sunlit meadows, the sweetest roses bloom when I arrive, and songbirds await my coming to sing their most joyous melodies.”

“Yes, and my path,” said Sorrow, turning slowly away, “leads through the dark forest, and moonflowers, which open only at night, will fill my hands. Yet the sweetest of all earthly songs - the love song of the night - will be mine. So farewell, dear Joy, farewell”

Yet even as Sorrow spoke, he and Joy became aware of someone standing beside them. In spite of the dim light, they sensed a Kingly Presence, and suddenly a great and holy awe overwhelmed them. They then sank to their knees before Him.

“I see Him as the King of Joy,” whispered Sorrow, “for on His head are many crowns, and the nailprints in His hands and feet are the scars of a great victory. And before Him all my sorrow is melting away into deathless love and gladness. I now give myself to Him forever.”

“No, Sorrow,” said Joy softly, “for I see Him as the King of Sorrow, and the crown on His head is a crown of thorns, and the nailprints in His hands and feet are the scars of terrible agony. I also give myself to Him forever, for sorrow with Him must be sweeter than any joy I have ever known.”

“Then we are one in Him,” they cried in gladness, “for no one but He could unite Joy and Sorrow.” Therefore they walked hand in hand into the world, to follow Him through storms and sunshine, through winter’s severe cold and the warmth of summer’s gladness, and to be “sorrowful, yet alway rejoicing.”

“May we all be challenged to live each day as though we stood on the edge of eternity.”  Mrs. Beth Clapper

(read more about Daves life)